Don't Make A Wish

She sat down across from me, sighed, and looked up and met my eyes.

"Somedays I'm just so sad. Somedays I really don't like my life."

I nodded, and encouraged her to keep talking.

"I feel like I must have been made for more than this. Am I wasting my time? Will things ever change?"

I pulled out my journal and read to her something that I had written nearly three weeks earlier:

Sometimes I am convinced that my purpose is so much greated than the ways I am currently spending my days. There's gotta be more than this. I know I was made for more than this...

I am so glad that I serve a God who gives me people who echo my very thoughts. There DOES have to be more than this, especially if I'm not the only one who feels like this. I mindlessly spend ten or eleven hours a day at work, happily, and yet I still feel like I must have been made to live and to feel. I feel like I might do greater things.

Yet, part of me is content to be where God has placed me right now. Maybe it's because I have a job I can get lost in. Maybe it's because I work so much that I don't have much time to worry about it. Maybe it's because God has slowed me down enough to finally show me who I am, and what I am made of. I'm not really sure.

What I am sure of, though, is that God won't leave my soul empty forever. He knows what He's doing, and He's got everything planned. He hears the longings in my heart, and He gives me what I need to make it from one week to the next (yes, I've graduated from day-to-day to week-to-week). I am blessed, and I will learn to be content where I am placed.

Tonight as I was driving home, it occured to me that as I blew out my birthday candles the other night, I didn't make a wish. I love the thought that even though my heart may be empty right now, I am content in it, and I could not wish for more. To me, that is accomplishment. To me, that is growth. And truly truly, I think it's beautiful. It's the beautiful, compelling epic we call a life following Jesus. Here's to another year...